Learned Helplessness, the true oppressor of mankind

I write this post in the hopes that someone who is searching for answers will find it and realize they struggle with learned helplessness, as I did. I was lucky. I had someone who loved me enough to give me a swift kick in the ass, then gently helped me change my ways. Not everyone is so lucky. Many people go their whole lives without realizing that their approach and outlook on life is distorted. They may realize something is wrong, but don't understand the source of their self destructive behavior. If you find that you do struggle with learned helplessness, seek professional help. I will give you some advice on steps you can take yourself, but it is extremely hard to break free of learned helplessness alone. You will need help, even if it's just a friend who loves you enough to give you a swift reality check from time to time.

First, it is important to define what I mean by learned helplessness. The clinical definition is full of long, scientific words. Unless you're a psychologist, the clinical definition will confuse you. That's why I will use my personal definition.

I define "Learned Helplessness" as: An outlook on life where you believe that you have little or no control over events and results in your life. If you break it down into the two words, it's an obvious concept. Learned, meaning this is a habit that is learned. You aren't born with it. It isn't a genetic or biological disorder. Helplessness, meaning a feeling of having no power. Some synonyms of helplessness are: abandoned, vulnerable, destitute, and powerless. The hallmark of learned helplessness is passing blame rather than introspection of your own actions.

This may seem a very foreign concept. But, take a moment to really think about it. When you are faced with a problem do you throw your hands up and assume the worst outcome is inevitable? Or do you examine the problem, consider solutions, and take measurable steps toward a resolution? If you throw your hands up, you've been conditioned to learned helplessness. If you examine, consider, and act, you probably don't have learned helplessness.

Examples of Learned Helplessness:
Learned helplessness manifests itself in varying degrees. Below are some examples:

• A person who is overcome with defeatism, and throws in the towel immediately when faced with a problem. 
• Someone who makes some efforts toward resolving the problem, but gives up as defeated when confronted with a minor obstacle. 
• A person who always avoids problems, or runs away from problems, rather than facing them.

If there's anything to learn from this article it is this: You can overcome learned helplessness! It is really a matter of changing how you look at life, and especially changing your internal dialogue. The truth is, you become what you think about all the time. If you think about failure and hopelessness, you will become those things. You have to change the way you talk to yourself in your mind.

Let me give some background into learned helplessness. Then, we'll get into steps you can take to exorcise it from your life.

Background of Learned Helplessness:
In 1967, psychologist Martin Seligman was studying depression. In some cruel animal experiments, he realized that a dog could be conditioned (taught, learned) to exhibit helpless behavior.

The experiment went something like this:
Two groups of dogs were given electric shocks. In group A, the dogs could avoid the shock by pushing a panel with their nose. In group B, the dogs received the shock regardless of what their actions. After a while, group A mastered avoiding the shocks. However, group B had become listless, unmotivated, and would make no effort to avoid the shocks.

Once the conditioning was complete, the conditioned dogs were put into a box with a low barrier in the middle. To avoid being shocked, they only had to jump over the low barrier to the other side of the box. The hypothesis was that group A would learn quickly and jump to the other side, but group B would exhibit the same helpless behavior and stay in the side with the shocks.

The hypothesis turned out to be true. Despite watching other dogs successfully avoid shocks by jumping to the other side of the box, 6 out of 8 dogs from group B did not take any steps to avoid the shock.

Conditioning in Humans:
You may be thinking: This is all fine and good for dogs, but what does it have to do with me? The truth is, psychological conditioning has the exact same effect on dogs as it does on humans. Just like Pavlov's dog, people can also be conditioned to salivate when hearing a ringing bell. Conditioning is used in advertising all the time. It's the reason you feel hungry when you see a commercial for your favorite restaurant.

In the case of learned helplessness, your conditioning usually begins in your childhood. Sometimes it is the result of neglect and abuse. Sometimes you simply learn it by watching your parents exhibit the same behavior. It's usually a combination of neglect, abuse, and watching your parents. Aside from the neglect and abuse, don't be too hard on your parents. After all, there were probably circumstances beyond their control that led to their conditioning. Blaming others is also a serious problem for those who struggle with learned helplessness, so placing blame should be avoided. Remember, look at solutions rather than looking for someone to blame.

Every child is born with naivete and blind faith. Children are taught moral lessons in very simple terms. All moral lessons are boiled down to a good vs. evil dichotomy, which is easy for young minds to grasp. Attentive parents will slowly "fill in the blanks" of the moral lessons, and teach their kids self discipline and personal responsibility.

Unfortunately, some of us are born into circumstances which left us burdened with learned helplessness. In those circumstances, very few of us have the "blanks" filled in or learn self discipline and personal responsibility. As we grow into adults, we continue to see the world in simple terms of good vs. evil, and we don't learn the lessons of self discipline and personal responsibility. We tend to look at difficulties as insurmountable obstacles rather than problems that have solutions. We learned that our efforts. prompts only superficial introspection of our behavior. Instead, it allows blame to flow to "the devil", and credit to go to God, without much critical introspection on our own actions. Whatever introspection happens, it is so superficial that it does not produce positive reinforcement of positive actions, or negative deterrents to negative behavior. It often leaves us with a deeply held belief that the world is unfair and discriminatory.

We should not be too quick to blame our parents. Very often they inherited the learned helplessness and the "Good / Evil crutch" from their own parents. Going back through your ancestors to place blame is pointless. You don't know what kinds of circumstances each of them faced while raising their own family. That's why we have generations of poverty stricken families that are unaware of the self destructive behavior they pass along to their children. Very often it isn't a matter of being lazy. It's more a matter of the learned helplessness.

I would like to caution against oversimplification in this subject. This is not the same as a believer asking "What would Jesus do". Asking that question is actually self reflective, which is the opposite of the "God / Devil crutch". People who use the "God / Devil crutch" perform very superficial self evaluation, and deflect blame to "the devil" and credit to "God" in the process.


When you mix the naivete of youth, blind faith, learned helplessness, and the "God/devil crutch" together you have an individual with massive capacity for self destruction.

In my opinion, learned helplessness is at the root of the problems that plague otherwise reasonable people. Take a look around you and realize that ONLY YOU have the power to turn your life around. Reflect on the problems you face, and use words like "I take responsibility for...". Take emotional ownership and responsibility for your mistakes, and take steps to ensure you won't make the mistakes in the future.

Once you start taking responsibility for your actions, you will notice that you are making improvements in your life. You aren't a helpless child adrift on rough seas. You are a rational adult who is capable of fixing your problems. If I can do it, anyone can do it.